I just LOVE how this shit-gripping story gets better and better. (First gripped here and here)
Seems as if Kieffe & Sons, that FORD dealership in California wasn't really sorry about offending non-believers in their radio commercials, despite their public apology.
They are now claiming FORD forced them to be contrite and that they fully stand by the 'sentiment' of the commercial.
I certainly hope there enough believers to keep them in business (seems as if MANY Christians have also been offended by the comments) because they're going to need all the help thay can get.
Especially if enough people complain to FORD about Kieffe's & Sons beligerent attitude and their attack on free speech (remember they told us to "sit down and shut up") and FORD then take away their franchise.
Kieffe & Sons Part III
Michelle Malkin & Dunkin Donuts
As shit-grippers go Michelle Malkin is quite the opinionated little right-wing floozy.
She actually had the balls to berate Rachael Ray and Dunkin Donuts for helping to promote "Jihadi chic". What a load of old shit. Does this mean the terrorists' true intent is to undermine our fried and baked munchies industry? Oh no!!!
Dunkin Donuts also deserve my "shit-gripping" accolade for actually believing what this delusional attention-seeking moron was spouting... and then consequently pulling the advertisement.
It is clear that Malkin has nothing better to do in her little "ultra-conservative" world but to pick her nose and find things wrong in the otherwise innocent world of... donuts. Some commentator she is?!
I think the true crux of the story is that Malkin is just jealous that Ray has what is known in England as a "three knob gob" whilst the Fox News commentator wouldn't even get touched with a bargepole.
Kieffe & Sons Part II
So, Kieffe & Sons, the FORD Dealership mentioned in yesterday's post has felt it necessary to make a public apology, but in doing so successfully manages to offend even more people (by, amongst other things, suggesting that only atheists were originally upset) whilst simultaneously blaming its longtime advertising writer and producer for the oversight.
Not accepting responsibility is, indeed, the real American way and nothing less than I would expect from people like this.
The longtime advertising writer and producer meanwhile - who goes by the name of J.W.Horne - has written a totally unapologetic rant on his own (new) blog which has nurtured many emotive responses, almost ALL of them negative and criticising him for his actions.
Criticism which he responds to flippantly, more or less boasting about how successful he has been in radio advertising and that this ad was no different to any others he had produced.
Unfortunately this blog is the second version of his debut posting yesterday. No more apologetic, but sadly missing out on some of the blatantly offensive and vitriolic rhetoric of the original. Changing the content is within his rights, obviously, but given the passionate nature of the shitstorm he has caused he may have been wiser to get it right the first times instead of resorting in a cowardly manner later.
If you know anyone in radio who uses the highly questionable services of J.W. Horne for their advertising, you may want to point out to them the bigoted, idiotic and totally unprofessional manner he adopted for his client Kieffe & Sons.
Truth be told, the hypocritical little shit-gripper needs to be retired from all work as soon as humanly possible. Why not drop him a line or give him a call using those contact details and suggest he gets over himself? Along, of course, with any other comments you may have. He sounds like the kind of guy who just LOVES hearing from people while he swims about in his own shit.
Kieffe & Sons
More religious hypocrisy to grip my shit...
Southern Californian FORD dealership Kieffe & Sons have been running radio commercials to (one has to presume) "promote" their business.
These commercials have taken the promotional angle of... erm... ATTACKING non-Christians and condemning people who believe prayer should not be taught in school.
Here's a transcript of the ad:-
"Did you know that there are people in this country who want prayer out of schools, "Under God" out of the Pledge, and "In God We Trust" to be taken off our money?
But did you know that 86% of Americans say they believe in God? Now, since we all know that 86 out of every 100 of us are Christians who believe in God, we at Kieffe & Sons Ford wonder why we don't just tell the other 14% to sit down and shut up. I guess maybe I just offended 14% of the people who are listening to this message. Well, if that is the case, then I say that's tough, this is America folks, it's called free speech. And none of us at Kieffe & Sons Ford are afraid to speak up. Kieffe & Sons Ford on Sierra Highway in Mojave and Rosamond: if we don't see you today, by the grace of God, we'll be here tomorrow"
What a pompous self-righteous piece of work. I actually admire his free speech rant but unfortunately not when he twins it with the comment that us non-believers should sit down and "shut up"... that kinda defeats part of the argument doesn't it?
Are "86% of us" really all "Christians who believe in God"? I wonder which corner of his cavernous rectal passage he plucked that one out of?
I find it incredible that any business owner would chose to promote himself this way, and wonder what Ford think about this dickhead dealer, who represents THEM, effectively discriminating against potential buyers of their vehicles. (In fact, why not contact Ford's public relations division and let them know what you think?)
I sincerely hope (but not pray, obviously) that Ford pull his dealership right out from underneath his smug hypocritical rear-end. Nothing would please me more as a post-script to this story.
Furthermore, that as a result of his short-sighted idealism, he is forced into major league bankruptcy and pushed out onto the streets to survive.
So let's hear it for karma and let's discover if 86% of us would give a flying fuck about his predicament.
American Airlines
Not content with bleeding their customers dry with "fuel surcharges", American Airlines have doubtless started a brand new trend in the airline industry by introducing a shit-gripping $15 fee for a flyer's' FIRST checked piece of luggage.
Not the often unnecessary second or third suitcases that clothes-hounds travel across the country with, but the FIRST bag, which is pretty much a must-have for most travellers.
American are also planning to charge higher fees for their "reservation help desk".
I think what's surprising about that is that they already charge a fee to customers calling for help on how to book a flight
People bitching about gas prices
People who bitch about gas prices grip my shit.
It might just be my imagination, but it seems like the people who moan the most are the same people who like to waste gas the most. The ones who leave their vehicles idling all the time they are in a store, drive around with a weighty trunk full of unnecessary junk or gun their engines when the lights turn green.
Maybe they're also the ones who make all those stupid little 500-yard trips to the local convenience store or drive-thru restaurant every lunchtime?
You hear them complaining about how gas costs $4 a gallon whilst in the same breath boast of some "made in japan' trinket they found whilst shopping at Kmart or Walgreens.
Or they drive a huge SUV and just "don't get it", as if gas is some kind of unquestionable right.
I feel genuinely sorry for the people who have to drive miles to and from their place of employment, but in many cases those people consciously chose the 'dream' of living out in America's vast suburban landscape and are simply now having to properly pay the price of being so very far from everything.
America's PAST is based on cheap transportation. America's FUTURE has to be based on something entirely different and far more sustainable.
(A glass of beer at the Great American Ball Park costs the equivalent of $62 a gallon. I don't hear as many people bitching about that!)
Silly Alcohol Laws
Today is an election day here in Kentucky.
Like all election days, the supermarkets and liquor stores are not allowed to "sell beer or wine until the polls have closed"
Why?
What possible difference can someone buying beer or wine make to today's events?
Like so many other archaic stupid laws that remain on statute books across the country this one needs to be removed.
I didn't want to buy beer or wine this morning when I went to the local Krogers, but boy if I did this stupid ruling would have most certainly gripped my shit!
George W Bush (2)
I see our clueless precedent continues to stake his place in political history with his comments.
Bush has revealed just how he acknowledges the sacrifices of soldiers in Iraq and their families.
He's given up playing golf.
By not playing golf, he says, he is telling families "I feel your pain, I'm not on the course"
Grip-shittingly unbelievable
George W Bush (I)
I'm sure that if I looked hard enough at what he was doing I could publish a "grips my shit" post about our erstwhile president and his useless lying cronies (Hi Dick!) every hour of every day.
Anyway, just to reiterate, George W Bush grips my shit
Not content last week with attempting to re-write history by suggesting his (in)famous "mission accomplished" banner in 2003 was misunderstood by everybody ("What? I gave the impression that the war was over? Phooey!") his administration once again put the health of the American public at risk.
They urged a federal appeals court to STOP - I'll repeat that... STOP U.S. meat packers from testing all their animals for mad cow disease (also known as Scrabble-beating "Bovine spongiform encephalopathy" or, more boringly, BSE)
The government sought to make a Kansas-based beef supplier - and others - quit conducting more comprehensive checks on its product saying that "widespread testing does not guarantee food safety and could result in a false positive that scares consumers"
Is this Mad Politician Disease (Bovine Spongibob Squarepants) or what?
I'll warrant that this had more to do with the lobbying of a Washington "Special Interest Group" than it does with the fake remarks coming out of the Agricultural Department.
What a load of old bull. Or, rather, cow.
Goodyear Tire & Gemini Service Centers
The response of a couple of Goodyear service center employees has gripped my shit, so much so that I will NEVER now use Goodyear tires or visit any of their nationwide locations.
My wife and I were out the other Friday evening doing a necessary grocery run. A few yards from our home we noticed a strange road noise from one side of the car. Thinking we had a flat tire we pulled over and walked around the wheels. No flat, but one tire had what seemed to be the head of a huge screw/bolt embedded in it!
It was only 5:50pm, so we drove to the nearest repair location thinking we could get sorted out and be on our way again to the grocery. It was a Gemini/Goodyear Service center, but one which had absolutely no concept of the word "service".
As we pulled up in front of the office I saw one employee at the counter exclaim "GODDAMN IT" through the glass when he saw us. Upon walking in, we were told in no uncertain terms that they closed at 6 and wouldn't be able to help us. No apologies, no effort to help or advise, no nothing.
As luck would have it we were able to (slowly) drive to another (far friendlier and immediately helpful) repair center in the neighbourhood (Car-X) where we left the vehicle overnight for the repair to be carried out early the following morning. Now, we could just have easily have done that at Goodyear, but it was evident that their employees just didn't want to even care enough to suggest that.
Along with JC Penney, IHOP and a (sadly growing) number of other businesses, Goodyear is now a company we will never use again (their products or franchised "Gemini" service centers) and we will be sure to share our experiences with others so they too can shop elsewhere.
Walgreens
A Walgreens in New York has succesfully gripped my shit.
Whilst waiting in line at this particular Walgreens to be served, a woman went into a diabetic coma, a potentially fatal condition.
A police officer and a couple of nurses, who happened to be in line at the same time, came immediately to her rescue. They grabbed some sugar and a carton of orange juice off the store shelves and started administering them to her. They also used a glucometer off the shelf to get a quick reading on this poor woman's blood sugar levels.
When the paramedics arrived to take the woman to hospital, the manager of the Walgreens walked up to the nurses and police officer and, instead of praising them for their swift action in saving a customer's life, actually DEMANDED they pay him for the orange juice, sugar and glucometer. If they didn't, he added, he would have them arrested for shoplifting.
Once again, profit over people. Un-fucking-believable.
This little dude on the toilet was created by lego artist